Scot the whole world...

I went to a conference in Scotland recently and stayed in a hotel.

I vowed to keep myself out of mischief, but then I managed to break my TV within seconds of getting to my room - part of the plug snapped off when I unplugged it from the wall.

I explained this to the receptionist & came back later to discover the replacement TV had no buttons (besides on/off) - the remote control was missing so the TV was untuneable

I told the manager (who had taken over at reception). He developed a peculiar bipolar fury/fawn complex; he would apologise to me profusely at the mistake, but then swear consonant-heavily (about the "f'kin' uddiot, stupp'd bast'rrd" who swapped the TVs) - but he flipped from one state to the other several times a sentence. I find a heavy Scots accent hard to follow at the best of times, but when some guy's swearing his head off but saying sorry, it all gets very confusing.

He brought up a replacement telly & plugged it in. No reception. That set him off again worse than before - he stomped away, loudly cursing and apologising. (Obviously a graduate from the Basil Fawlty School of Hotel Management.)

The aerial wasn't plugged in properly - a small tweak & it worked fine.
Blokey rang up from reception (although I don't know why he bothered, I could hear him just as clearly shouting from downstairs) about telly#4 so I relievedly told him all was well...
... and then fell asleep. I didn't watch any TV during my stay. Oops.
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Breakfast was another delight. Telling the chef which items I wanted for my fry-up, each time greeted with louder & more exaggerated yells of "NAE BOWTHER!"

Luckily I didn't found out how he'd react if it had been a bother...



And then on to the conference...
(to be continued)